“Schorschbräu is known worldwide for its strong beers. This SchorschBock 13 is a perfect example of it. This German beer has a nice orange robe topped by a fine white head. On the nose, you will find notes of spices, mildly roasted malt and a fruity aroma. In the mouth, the alcohol is dominant but well balanced with flavours of caramel, peach and a smoky note.”

Glassware: Stein.

Appearance: Deep mahogany pour with a short tan head which rapidly fizzes out. There’s almost zero head remaining and zero lace as a result.

Aroma: Oh my Lord what have we here?! First thoughts are apple and blackcurrant juice spiked with pure alcohol. Then the heavily caramelised malts take over; treacle, toffee and rich caramel fudge. Fist fulls of sweet dark fruits i.e raisins, prunes, dates, fig, blood plum and red grape juice. Christmas cake and spices, gingerbread, caramelised pear/apple and subtle toasty notes. Wow!

Flavour: Lands somewhere between an Eisbock, a Barleywine and a Quadrupel. It is so jam packed upfront it’s impossible to know where to start. This residual sugary sweetness dominates…dark fruits, Christmas cake, Port, sweet earthy spice, toffee, treacle and a soft roasty-ness. It progresses into a more yeast-driven middle: banana split, thick honey and apple pie then on to a somewhat roasty, uber rich and sweet caramelised finish for days.

Mouthfeel: Dense, chewy, sticky and syrupy. Full bodied, low carbonation. 13% ABV is perceptible as anticipated.

Overall: Apart from the sudden rush of alcohol to the brain this Doppelbock/Barleywine/Quad/whatever you want to call it is literally face-numbing, enamel-stripping, hangover-inducing Jesus juice. Bring the noise!